Or, How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love (OK, Appreciate) Parent Complaints

Q: What’s worse that hearing parent complaints?
A: Not hearing them.

If you’re one of the lucky few not getting any negative feedback, it’s not because no one has any to give. This is not cynicism, but an empirical conclusion drawn over long experience. I have yet to encounter a school of any size or educational philosophy with no parent complaints. I’ve also yet to encounter the school—or any institution for that matter—that hasn’t benefited from hearing them.

Complaints are like pain—the (parent) body’s way of letting you know there is some kind of problem. (Also, they hurt) While most schools are blessed with a few strident voices, the majority of parents wait until they consider an issue ‘serious’ before approaching the school and share their with mild-to-moderate concerns or discontent only among themselves.

It might be tempting to ignore those complaints parents don’t see fit to deliver—but it’s not wise. Happier parents are more involved and engaged to everyone’s benefit and the subject of the complaint can be dealt with, rather than left to simmer. Parent complaints aren’t a nuisance, but an opportunity for insight; especially if you have an eye to recruitment. Your current parents are your best representations of your prospective parents and what concerns the former will more than likely concern the latter..

Some ideas to draw out (seems counter-intuitive, I know) parent complaints and concerns in a constructive, non-confrontational way:

Surveys. Not everyone will respond, but those will who have something to say and unlike the internet, anonymity doesn’t make people mean in a survey. It makes them honest.

Focus groups. Not as complicated or as corporate as it sounds. Depending on the size of your school, divide your parents into small groups (10 or under) or select a number of parents from each grade or other category and conduct small, 90-minute group discussions. (Two hours may seem like an imposition and an hour may not seem worth a 30 minute round-trip drive.)
The school library, drama room or cafeteria is better than a classroom or formal meeting room and the moderator should be someone the parents don’t deal with every day—someone who isn’t the face of the school. In other words, not the principal or the school secretary and certainly not a teacher. Make sure they are informed beforehand if you are recording the session.

Volunteer parent liaisons. If you don’t have ’em, get ’em. Or at least one. Then meet with them regularly. They’re not just for organizing phone trees and collecting school trip fees. Parent liaisons offer first-hand and anecdotal insights into parent concerns and give you a chance to demonstrate the school’s commitment to addressing them.

P/T-style admin conferences. I admit, this might not be logistically possible with larger school populations, however where I have seen this done it has produced mutually (parent and admin) and highly satisfactory results. The idea is to offer parents short scheduled conferences with admins, either during the same period as parent-teacher conferences (in small schools) or throughout the course of the year. Not every parent will have the time or interest in meeting with you and even if they do, a few targeted questions, followed by a good long listen, will make the investment in time and scheduling efforts well worthwhile.

Social media. I don’t recommend actively soliciting parent feedback on your school’s social media page (imagine what future Google searches might turn up!) but many parent complaints begin as unanswered—or unsatisfactorily answered—questions. Mine your social media feeds for FAQs, then use a more private and targeted medium to address them.

Final note: For all the but the smallest school populations, I would advise against a ‘suggestion’ or worse, ‘complaint’ box. And I don’t advise it for them, either.